Much has transpired since last I wrote. Not, I hasten to add, anything that is going to get me off of online dating. Good for you, not so much for me! There have been some interesting adventures. Have gone on a few dates since the last time and more in the hopper.
Firstly, there was Yogaguy. He’s like an 8th degree yogi or something odd like that and thinks he’s got it all figured out. We met at a local bar, a nice one with a restaurant I’ve never been to…I waited in the front and waited in the front, etc. Retreated outside and then he came out the door saying that he’d been inside the entire time. Had he not thought to look at the entrance? Perhaps 8th degree yogis can just intuit that.
We sat at the bar, neither of us drinking anything alcoholic. Probably, I should have as he was standing in what was definitely my personal space the entire time. It was a little odd, and I drank down my Peligrino quickly. He then began to massage my lower spine. I’m good in that I don’t flinch anymore when strangers touch me (I did used to do this).
He was running his hand up and down my spine and it rested on my lower spine. Might have been much better had I been more attracted, but it was a mediocre experience.
He asked me what I felt. Wasn’t sure what was expected of me, and replied, “…er well a little vibration. What was I supposed to be feeling?” And he then said, “No chemistry.” And I thought, yep, buster that’s about right. So I slurped down the rest of the Pellegrino and made to leave. He then decided to walk me to the car.
I must interject that when we first made contact he emailed me and made it clear after 3 emails that I had reached my limit. He gave me his phone number and said that I could call when I had time. I found his process confusing and not just a little annoying (as well as abrupt and rude). And, I was so annoyed that I thought, let me call him because I’m feeling such hostility that maybe there’s something there. On the phone he told me his life story and seemed somewhat nicer. He did inform me that getting a second date with him was like hitting the jackpot, and a great compliment.
So back to walking me back to my car. I thought I wasn’t getting the second date, and it wasn’t breaking my heart. I got in my car and drove away. Two weeks later I get an email from him that either I needed a stiff drink the next time I saw him or I should just go directly to his bed and have a couple of orgasms and then maybe I would loosen up and he could get to know me.
There is no answer to that.
There was another guy that I winked at on Match. I have said how very much I hate those, but, nevertheless, I do it. At any rate, he asked for my number and called right away. He was nice looking and apparently a special effects coordinator for the movies. He proceeded to tell me his life story. He was a simple man as he constantly told me. He loved to ride his Harley, he was a cowboy, and he was just down to the earth.
He harped on those themes for nearly a half hour. I mentioned that nothing was going to get me onto his motorcycle. He then said to me, “I pretty much have talked you out of this, haven’t I.” And, I said, “Yep.”
Next!
Got back on my fitness site. Don’t ask why as there is no earthly reason for it other than the fact that it seemed a good idea to go out with guys who looked good in bathing suits for the summer.
I contacted another guy who was a stunt and fight coordinator.
Are you all impressed with how proactive I am??
Anyhow, this guy was a black belt in about 20 different types of self-defense and actually a very nice person. We met for coffee in a different place, not my usual coffee bean and had a decent chat. When it was time to go home, I said to him that it would be nice to hang out and he agreed.
I received an email from him the following day that he would like to take in a film with me. I thought that okay. His problem was that he was a little far away and so we had to agree to meet in-between. We did and saw X-Men. I thought we were doing pretty well, although I have to admit that I didn’t have a lot to say to him. He did enough talking with prompting and I kept telling myself he’s very nice, he’s good-natured, he’s attractive.
However, in the end, the movie was it for us. I guess he just felt the same vibe I did and thought we didn’t click. I would have given it another date, but then, I am always willing to give it another date. It’s how I was raised.
Luckily done with my class and on a respite going to the other end of the country for a week. Before I went, I contacted one more guy at Match. He was an actor that had been in law enforcement, and since One Syllable, I’m afraid that’s been the type that makes me salivate as much as some of my friends (and you know who you are) despise me for this penchant.
He texted me back and forth for a day or so and then sent me a picture that I should use for my contacts and did I have one for his? Well, frankly, even if I did, I thought the whole process was a little premature. And I was right. I met him at the local coffee bean and listened to him talk about himself for about two hours. I contributed a little, but seriously, just a little. He needed little prompting and few questions. He was really, REALLY attractive, but at the end of the two hours, I actually had to cut him off, and he muttered something about the fact that he could tell me even more stories.
Once again, I thought, perhaps he’s worth a second date. Perhaps he got his storytelling out of his system and we could actually have some back and forth communication. At any rate, I politely texted him that I had a nice time and enjoyed him, and may I say, I thought I was being generous. I needn’t have bothered. He didn’t answer, which was, I thought, extremely rude.
Just in passing this texting thing!! I am only beginning to understand the rudiments of the process. How long one is supposed to wait before returning a text, how much you say in a text which is might be utterly different to how you would speak to someone in person.
It’s manipulative and mystifying.
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